Slot Cars For Sale

Can you write an amusing, story of Selling your home that includes 6 of these lines .....?

just for fun? 1. Nobody move! Where are my "Gunsmoke" DVDs and tapes?! 2. How much will it cost? 3. I fell in stool .... Of course, the paint was in my hands. 4. Ohhhhh, now you tell me. 5. My gawd move remind me of the Marx Brothers ...... 6. You open day ...... I'll play the slots .... See you soon! 7. The neighbors looked on in disbelief. 8. Uncharted territory. 9. God thank you, I'm still young and I have no pain ...... Yeah, it's this. 10. I banged my head so many times on the rafters, I lost count. 11. I'm itching, I'm bitchy and I need a long hot bath. 12. The rest of my life have waited patiently for me.

A moving story here Kitty. Why oh why did I ever allow myself to be talked in selling our house and move into a retirement home? I did not know the trauma that awaited me as I went through the ordeal of selling our house and robbing a lifetime memories .... and I do not mean just my memories. I mean the memories of my husband, our four children, dogs and different cats over the years. I swear I'll never use the term "stripping" again, as long as I live! I did not know where to start the first basement fear - or that territory Uncharted ..... the attic! Let me make it perfectly clear, I am the only one in the family for which Garner was uncharted territory. Who knew there was a "pull-down steps to the attic? I just thought that we explore space up there. Only after 25 years when the children were all grown, I discovered that it was their hideout. Even their father (My husband) snuck up there from time to time when he wanted to "get away." I'll admit I heard "sounds" from time to time, but I thought it was squirrels, mice or bats, or maybe other small critters, I was better do not know about. I still do not "get" my fascination with the family attic. "Could we have what they really wanted was to hide from ME? "While I was up there, I hit my head so many times on the rafters, I LOST COUNT. Of course, when children were small, which was not a problem for them! After countless trips to the recycling center, landfill and a garage sale years George and I decided we were finally ready to call a realtor. She walked through our house highlighting all the things we would need to determine, if we expected to receive "high price" for sale. The new roof was the only thing we did not think we could attack us. We asked the roofer, who was recently home of our neighbor, to give us an offer. NEVER ask an offer from a roofer without First shot a few martinis to soften the blow! Believe me, the scariest words in the English language are, "how much will it cost?" - Or its corollary, "! Okay there are costs "in the long run, the house was finally ready to" show ". The real estate agent suggested we stay at home in case there were any questions potential buyers. I replied testily: "I would not hire you if I wanted to deal with questions. YOU DO NOT OPEN .... it's your job TO MEET THE 'LOOKENSTEIN'S'...... George and I'll play the slots at Indian casinos .... See Ya! "Later ....." How the slots? "Called the realtor in order to make conversation." Not so hot! " I responded crankily. "Shame!" She cooed. "They're hot yesterday when I was there. "..... "Ohhhhh, now you tell me! I replied sarcastically. Surprisingly, the realtor called us in midweek and said she had a firm offer for the house - and our price. The only problem is that they wanted to take immediate possession. Now the real fun began, on the movers! MY MOVERS me MARX BROTHERS reminiscent .... Karl and Groucho. Gawd-Karl left a trail of destruction rather in its wake, and the name of Groucho just says it all! I panicked when I thought of my beloved Gunsmoke DVDs and tapes fall into the hands of these Neanderthals. "Nobody move! WHERE ARE MY 'GUNSMOKE DVDs and tapes?! "Groucho stroked his mustache for a moment and replied:" Let there be bright about the size of a saucer? " ..... "YESSS!" I hissed. Groucho smiled slyly and said: "I think I saw Karl play Frisbee with them and your dog!" I went to save my treasures, when I noticed a rather odd sight through the front door open. The All neighbors watched in disbelief as Karl and Groucho did my husband still asleep to the moving truck - taped to the chair! I thought it was pretty funny, and maybe I'd just leave it there for some time to teach him the lesson he was absolutely no help at all, the theory being that he would realize that when he awake! As I have been fantasizing about it, I realized that the rest of my life have waited patiently for me, but the best part of it is sitting in a moving truck tied to a chair. ..... And - Karl and Groucho have slammed the doors, and are now driving down the street! Fortunately, they did not pack my bike, so I jumped on them and hailed when they stopped at the corner. Yes, I managed to save my greatest treasure of all, my husband ..... After all, "a man in the house is worth two in the street."

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